Futher thoughts on "Wandering"

To those of you who have commented on my post entitled "Wandering,"

I wondered, prayed, postponed and avoided the writing of that Blog entry for many weeks. I questioned if it was even "appropriate" to be so brutally honest in such a relatively public forum. But at the urging of my soul i felt what can only be described as a kind of need to do so nonetheless. The reaction of so many can only be described as amazing whispers from God.

I have felt God's presence so often through the embrace of others. Your words, come from a well-spring of care and compassion that even transcends those of us with a sharing of blood.

I am in a wandering place, yes. But i also have the hope that through this wandering i will be made stronger. And even though the wandering is by definition lonely...for no one else can do this for me...i know that i am not alone. Yes, i do frankly and boldly ask for your prayers, but i also ask that you trust as well. I will be well. In many ways i am well.

I have quite nearly begged God to help me slow down and have more time for prayer, reflection and the times of quiet you describe so eloquently. I cannot see past the "gift" this is.

Sometimes...many times perhaps...it is only in times of darkness that we are able to see the dim glow of faith that our otherwise busy lives have blinded us to the presence of. I so appreciate the image of the ancient pottery oil lamps. These lamps held what can only be described as a weak mixture of unprocessed olive oil and a braided wick. As you can imagine the light offered by such lamps was far from great. But it provided enough light to see the path just in front of them.

This...this is the kind of "lamp" described in Psalm 119 (verse 105). When Amy Grant made this verse famous, she sang that God's word is a lamp unto her feet and a light unto her path. I have heard that verse translated into "contemporary English" as a "flashlight"! What a misfortune! To be taken back to the image of the pottery lamp with its' weak light is to be brought into a necessary intimacy with both God's word and the God through whom it speaks. Wandering by the low light of an ancient oil lamp is therefore an intimate wandering in the embrace of God.

[Or is this just further confirmation that i am a "dim whit"?!]